adoption

Tracing your parents

Finding out that you have been adopted can be a real shock. Once you are 18 (its not possible before this age) its natural to want to find out about your real parents, and if you decide that you do want to trace them, its important that you do so in the right way, otherwise everyone involved - you, your real parents and your adoptive parents - can end up feeling hurt. You can do this by obtaining your original birth certificate. Here are some things to think about:

• Tracing parents can be difficult and time consuming. Be prepared to be frustrated, and bear in mind that you might have to confront difficult emotions along the way.
• Be careful about idealising your birth parents. It's easier to fall into the trap of expecting them to be loads better than your adoptive ones. But be realistic - no one can live up to unrealistic expectations.

Don't forget how your adoptive parents will feel about things. Be honest with them about what you're doing, and why you're doing it. And remember that they've been there for you a long time. 80 S EXUAL HEALTH AND RELATIONSHIPS